


Drunk (literally) in Love

by kat_alyst



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blushing Kaneki Ken, Boys In Love, Dancer Hide, Dirty Dancing, Drunk Dancing, Drunkenness, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Hide loves to tease, Love at First Sight, M/M, Shironeki | White-haired Kaneki, Student Kaneki, night club
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-22
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-04-27 15:05:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5053426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kat_alyst/pseuds/kat_alyst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaneki never thought in a million years that he could get drunk and (accidentally) end up grinding on an extremely attractive dancer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just thought I would write this. *Shoves story away from me*
> 
> I don't think I will be bothered to write another chapter because I already have another idea for a new story.
> 
> This is based of a prompt about Kaneki and Hide grinding against each other and I really couldn't help myself.
> 
> EDIT: 200 KUDOS!?!?! WOW! (also i cant believe i originally said i wouldn't continue this) I AM SO HAPPY THAT YOU GUYS LIKED THIS SO MUCH *breathes* okay sorry. I swear I'm crying right now this is amazing I love all of you.

“Kaneki, hurry your ass up!” A voice called from outside his bedroom door. Quite frankly, Kaneki didn't want to hurry up because he did not want to go out in the first place. Ayato had impulsively suggested that they go to a new night club he had heard about with Touka and Nishiki. Himself and Ayato weren't even good friends, there relationship was only bordering friends because of the fact that they had to share a dorm for his second year of university. However, Kaneki was grateful to Ayato since he was the one who did introduce him to his sister and Nishiki, who are Kaneki’s only friends.

“OK! Just wait a minute; I can’t go in my underwear.” Kaneki replied sardonically. He rushed to his wardrobe to pick something ‘not dorky’ to wear as Ayato had previously suggested. Struggling to find something to wear, he was saved when Ayato burst into the room with several items in hand.

“Jesus, Kaneki, It’s actually sad how lame you are. Look at your wardrobe. It’s nerd heaven.” Ayato commented while laying the clothes out on the bed. “Thank god for my cool self, heh?” Kaneki chose not to say anything in reply, he would probably get a kick to the shin if he otherwise. Ayato gestured to the clothes. “Which ones do you want to wear, nerd?”

Kaneki paused, to be honest, he had no idea what clothes would match. He would normally go with a safe bet on a jumper and pair of jeans but apparently they were ‘unacceptable’ to wear at a club. “These?” Kaneki asked lamely, pointing to a pair of black skinny jeans and blue top. They looked like they plainest he could get because of how over the top Ayato’s fashion sense was. Although Kaneki couldn't deny that Ayato did look good. When Ayato’s face morphed into one of horror, Kaneki realised he had made a mistake.

“No, no, NO! Kaneki, you clearly can’t be trusted with the job of dressing yourself any more so I will be taking over from now.” Ayato said while shaking Kaneki, who was completely uninterested in his words, by the shoulders. “You are going to wear this and you’re going to look damn good in it!” he continued and let go of the now frowning Kaneki to pick up a pair of ripped skinny jeans and a tight black top.

“Why did you ask me if you already knew what you wanted me to wear?” Kaneki asked while trying to squeeze into the clothes he had to wear. He mentally vomited at the sight of the clothes. The top had cuts at the side to reveal some of his skin and he couldn't help but feel a teeny bit slutty.

“I asked you because I had faith in you to pick something good. Never again will I do that, Kaneki.” Ayato sighed dramatically while trying to help Kaneki into his clothes. Once they were on he gave him a once over before nodding. “That will have to do; we’re late so we need to hurry up.” Kaneki was pulled by the arm into the hallway before having black boots shoved into his face.

“Those have heels Ayato! Why would I wear them? Next are you going to put make-up on me?” Kaneki said exasperated. He couldn't believe he was actually going through this ordeal.

“You will look good in them, stop complaining. A stark contrast between your hair and clothes will get you attention.” Ayato grumbled while waving the shoes in his face. “Just put them on!” Kaneki regretfully put them on and was pushed outside of their dorm into the dark streets of Tokyo. It was a nice night because it wasn’t cold and many people were also outside for a Saturday night out like them. Ayato set a fast walking pace as they pushed past people to get to the club as quickly as possible.

“Fuck sake, stupid Touka is going to kill us for being late. I'm going to tell her it’s your fault by the way.” Ayato said while harshly shoving his way past a group of drunken adults. Kaneki decided he wouldn't waste his breath speaking so ignored him. Surprisingly, they arrived sooner than expected and caught sight of Nishiki and Touka standing by the long line to enter the club. As they approached Nishiki turned towards them.

“Ah! So the two brats have decided to grace us with their presence.” Nishiki spoke grandly. Ayato stormed up to him and punched him in the shoulder.

“Shut up! It wasn't my fault it was Kan-“Ayato was cut off when Touka hooked her arm around his neck and dragged him into the line. He made choking sounds all the way and Nishiki, who had a smirk on his face, and Kaneki followed wordlessly.

“You shut up, twerp. No one wants to her you whining like a bitch.” Touka growled still holding him. Kaneki noted that she wore a nice red skirt and top which made her look a lot older then she really is. Unfortunately, the same thing couldn't be said for Nishiki as he only bothered to wear a dress shirt with jeans. Kaneki wondered why he couldn't go casual as well if he could.

“Guys, look.” Nishiki said interrupting their journey to the line. Everyone turned to see him holding up tickets to the club.

“…Are those VIP tickets?” Ayato said excitedly while trying to wriggle out of Touka’s grasp. “You bet your ass they are.” Nishiki said while leading them straight to the entrance. “I told you ages ago, Kimi works here so she can get us straight in.”

“Hell yes! I love your girlfriend.” Ayato exclaimed before getting a blow to his head from Touka.

“You’re an idiot! Nishiki, you can stop glaring at him. He didn't mean it like that.” Nishiki didn't show if he acknowledged what was said and show the bouncer the tickets that he had. They were allowed entrance without a word and the first thing Kaneki noticed was how dark it was inside, and it wasn't just the red and black lighting that gave that impression. The club was big but, packed with grinding bodies on the dance floor which was situated in front of a black stage. A neon drinks bar ran all around the outside of the floor and he could see a second floor above with people lounging on couches in front of a wall that was a massive fish tank.

“Whoa! I heard this place was cool but I didn't know it was this cool.” Ayato shouted over the loud music, Kaneki could hardly hear him and almost had the urge to cover his ears. The environment in this place was scandalous, he thought and he would rather go home and continue to be a ‘nerd’ than be here. Touka glanced at him and sent him a blank look. He knew she was concerned about him and that was just her way of communicating it.

“I’m going to the bar to see Kimi. You can do whatever the fuck you want.” Nishiki turned and walked off, not caring whether anyone had heard him or not. Kaneki stood awkwardly near the two siblings by the entrance. Ayato was now thrashing wildly to get out of Touka’s hold on him and she suddenly let him go, causing him to stumble forward. He snarled at his sister’s smirk.

“Fuck you!” He cried. “Actually I don’t care, I'm going to get so much tits you’ll be jealous!” Ayato stormed off into the mass of bodies. Kaneki looked at Touka who was bright red. She then noticed that he was still there and pulled him up the stairs to the second floor. “It’s such a smut fest down there. I don’t even know how Ayato convinced me to come.” She was able to say at a slightly normal volume as they got away from the loudest speakers. When they reached the next floor they were met with the sight of a few drunken people snogging on couches and another small bar. He heard Touka sigh but she; lead him towards an empty table away from the few people up there. “Well, this is interesting.” She droned, clearly bored already.

“How long do we have to stay here for, Touka-chan?” Kaneki asked quietly, staring at the fish tank behind them and not at the people who made the lewd sounds on the other side of the room.

“Until Ayato decides to show his face after getting ‘so many tits’” she snickered. “I have to make sure he doesn't accidently get himself into a drunken fight.” Leaning back on to the couch she fiddled with her skirt. There was a short pause. “How did he convince you of all people to come here anyway?”

“Forced submission.” Kaneki groaned while Touka snorted. They quieted when they noticed a small girl, who looked like a waitress, approaching their table. Touka’s eyes narrowed.

"H-hi! I'm Yoriko. I’ll be serving any drinks that you want.” She squeaked as her eyes darted between the two people before her. Kaneki looked at Touka who had a strange look in her eyes.

“…Oh what the hell, we’ll have the most alcoholic drink on the menu.” Touka declared. Kaneki immediately protested.

“Touka wh-“

“Kaneki, we might as well since we are here. Loosen up a bit, will you.” She intercepted. The waitress, Yoriko, still stood nervously waiting.

“Should I get you two vodkas then?” She inquired. Touka smiled and nodded as Kaneki continued to feel as if he was going to have a heart attack. Yoriko quickly turned around to go back to the bar. As soon as she was out of hearing range Kaneki lashed out at Touka.

“Touka-chan, what on earth are you doing?” He fretted. Touka remained deadpan. “I as the eldest should be telling you that it is immature to do this sort of thing!” He realised he wasn't going to get anywhere with her so decided to stop talking. Touka grinned in triumph. The waitress came back a tray in hand with their drinks.

“Here you go; it will be added on t-to your tab.” She stammered not looking at Touka as she bent over to put the drinks down. Kaneki wondered why she was so nervous in front of them.

“Thanks.” Touka said almost purring. Kaneki snapped his head towards her and became increasingly suspicious of her. What was she trying to do?

Yoriko’s face burned and she quickly bowed and left with a small “Enjoy!” Touka brought the glass to her lips and started to drink. Kaneki tried to copy her but ended up chocking loud enough for other people to turn towards him. Touka didn't pat his back.

“I was flirting, Kaneki.” Touka stated randomly. Kaneki almost asked her what she meant but realised she was referring to her interaction with Yoriko. Kaneki never knew Touka was interested in girls but, to be honest, he thought she was interested in no one. He also realised that Ayato had known about her from his comment to her before.

“Oh…” was the only thing he could say in reply. Suddenly a booming voice came from the lower floor. It sounded like someone was speaking into a microphone.

“ _Bonjour_ , _mesdames_ and _messieurs_. Welcome to Club Ikioi, I hope you’re having a _magnifique_ time.” A roar of cheers resounded through the club. Kaneki left his drink to stand up and went to the balcony that overlooked the second floor. A man with bright purple hair, flamboyantly dressed, stood in the middle of the raised stage. Kaneki noticed that he switched from speaking Japanese to French like nobody’s business.

“Today we have a special performance from your two favourite dancers; Hide and Rize!” He announced. Kaneki waited curiously while the cheers from the crowd grew louder, even the people up here had come to stand around the balcony. A different song started playing and the curtain revealed two dancers standing very close. Kaneki had to strain his eyes to see a woman with bold purple hair in a very short dress. Holding her was a man with bright blond hair wearing a white V-neck. As they started moving around the floor Kaneki found that he couldn't keep his eyes off them.

“They’re good aren't they?” Touka breathed startling him, he could tell she was tipsy. Kaneki had never seen a dancer dance as good as the two on the stage. It was so very sexy and intimate that it caused Kaneki’s neck to burn a deep pink. The man grabbed on to the woman’s hips, hands wondering even further south, and brought himself flush against her. Kaneki couldn't help but want to be in the woman’s place, and deducted that he felt like this because he was attracted to this man, Hide. Being completely captivated by the movement he failed to notice the man staring right back up at him in the balcony during the dance. When Kaneki realised he was being watched by the very man that was the centre of attention he hurried away from the balcony.

Somehow he felt he had sinned by looking at this man when in reality he was only doing the same as everyone else. Touka choose to go with him back to the table but, didn't comment. Kaneki picked up his drink and downed the whole thing.

“Hey! Kaneki! What?” Touka protested while wobbly walking towards the seat. “You shouldn't drink vodka like that!” Kaneki couldn't care less. He didn't know why, but he suddenly had the desire to drink after watching the performance. Maybe it was to calm his nerves. Or maybe it was to forget how the man looked at him as if he could see into his soul. He ignored Touka completely while she kept chiding him.

“Excuse me, uh… Yoriko! Could I get a Brandy?” Kaneki called, knowing that the vodka was already affecting his rational. He would have never been bold enough to get an alcoholic drink he’d never had before if he was sober.

Yoriko jumped with a “Yes sir!” before pouring the drink and carrying it over. She set it down but before she could leave a hand grabbed on to her arm. Kaneki watched as Touka’s cheeks grew hot.

“S-sorry! I-I …um just.” She took a breath. “Do you mind just sitting with me for a bit.” She rushed. Kaneki took this as sign to leave. He forced his brandy down his throat so he could leave and almost tripped to get away from the table. He heard Yoriko say something before she sat down with Touka. Good for her, he thought wryly. He found himself descending the stairs to the bottom floor. The dance had ended long ago and the voice from before had started speaking again.

“You might want to grab your _associé_ and head to the dance floor for these next songs.” He said and wolf whistles came from the crowd. Kaneki started to look for Ayato and Nishiki but suddenly the dark lights were dimmed even further that only the neon lights of the bar illuminated the club. His steps wavered as he pushed his way around the mass of bodies. He looked around the bar and spotted Kimi who was serving a stranger.

“Hi, Kimi.” He managed to say. She smiled at him but, realising the state he was in, stopped. Kaneki wondered for a moment what he looked like to her.

“Wow, Kaneki look at you! You look amazing. Are you okay though?” She worried. Kimi had only seen him a few times before but he had never looked so troubled (and attractive).

“No, ‘m fine. I think.” Kaneki mumbled. “’ave you seen Ayato?”

“Yeah actually, I have. He was sitting somewhere around here a few minutes ago but, I think he went to the dance floor. Also Nishiki isn't here any more-” She reported. Kaneki nodded, not listening to the rest, and walked closer to the dance floor. For some reason he was drawn to it. His heart rate quickened for some reason as he stumbled closer.

_Ayato, where are y-?!_

Kaneki tripped and fell into someone.

“Watch it!” The person snapped. Kaneki hurried to back away and apologise but bumped into someone else behind him. _Great_ , he thought, _I'm in so much trouble now_. However, he almost fainted when he turned around and saw who it was.

“Hey-“ a familiar blond man reflexively caught Kaneki when he started falling forward. “Wow, you could say you've fallen for me.” He chuckled. Kaneki’s ears grew red as he realised he has embarrassed himself in front of the very person he wanted to avoid.

“Sorry.” Kaneki slurred while trying to steady himself. He looked up to greet eyes which were a beautiful brown. His breath hitched, he was so close that he could even see the gold flecks that reflected in the dim light. If it was possible Kaneki grew even redder.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about! It should be me who’s sorry. My looks are just too stunning for you.” Hide concluded. Kaneki’s shoulders started shaking. He realised he was trying to hold back from laughing out loud. Not knowing whether it was the alcohol, the situation or just being in Hide’s presence he burst out in giggles. Hide stared at him in amazement before laughing himself. It drew attention to them but they didn't care.

The first song blaring from the speakers cut them off and Kaneki realised exactly what sort of situation he was in.

“Seeing as you’re here, do you want to dance with me?” Hide asked him hopefully. Kaneki couldn't refuse the puppy dog eyes before him.

“O-ok.” Kaneki gulped. Hide gave him a smile that was so… nice that Kaneki couldn't regret agreeing.

“Sweet! Do you know how to dance?” Hide said while moving his hands so they were on the other’s hips. Flustered, Kaneki almost forgot the question he was asked.

“…No.” He admitted. Why did he agree without even thinking about the fact that he has never danced in his life!

“That’s OK.” Hide assured “I’ll lead.” Kaneki felt his skin burning where Hide touched him. “Put your hands on my shoulders.” He said into his ear. Kaneki shakily followed the instruction and when his hands landed on Hide’s shoulder he felt the firmness of them.

“Good. Now just step with me.” Hide finished. Kaneki blanched, those vague instructions didn't help him at all. “When I step forward you step back.”

Kaneki ended up stepping on Hide’s feet a few times but, they ended up laughing every time it happened. Soon, they had mastered their own little dance. Kaneki shivered as Hide made small circles with his thumb on the exposed skin on Kaneki’s sides. He admired Hide’s face secretly throughout, mentally photographing the small freckles and flawlessly tanned skin.

“Kaneki Ken.” He had said randomly without an explanation. Hide hummed.

“Nagachika Hideyoshi.” He smiled, and nothing else had to be said.

As the songs went they increased in speed and intensity. Hide taught him new steps and Kaneki was forced even closer to him by the amount of people on the floor. Waiters came around after every song and both of them, no giving a care in the world, kept taking more and more to drink each time. They ended up getting increasingly drunk but, it was clear Hide could manage his drink better than Kaneki. By the time that they couldn't count how many songs they danced to, they were grinding up against each other like the rest of the people on the dance floor.

Kaneki was facing away from Hide drunkenly grinding downwards, breathing hard through his mouth, the stuffy air smelt like sex and alcohol. Hide pressed himself right up against Kaneki’s back while holding him close across the waist. They lost themselves in the music and the atmosphere of the club. Kaneki panted the others name as he burned from the inside, he would have never imagined himself being dry humped by some sexy dancer, who he didn't know, two hours ago. He felt lips press against the side of his neck, he moaned as the friction between them failed to waver.

“Kaneki,” Hide had whispered against his skin. “You’re so gorgeous.” Kaneki sighed. Hide’s nose trailed his neck up to his ear, teeth biting softly.

“H-hide!” Kaneki hissed, trying to cover his embarrassment. Hide pressed more tiny kisses to his neck. He yelped when Hide quickly turned him around. Kaneki, being slightly shorter, had direct view of Hide’s lips as soon as he steadied himself. He licked his own as he grabbed onto Hide’s shoulder once again, unable to take his eyes away.

Hide grabbed Kaneki’s chin and tilted it upwards. “May I?” he said, voice lowering by an octave, dark eyes searching his intently. Kaneki jerked his head upwards in response. Their lips met halfway and Kaneki froze. He had never kissed someone before; he had no idea what to do. Hide, as if mind reading him, took control of the kiss. He licked Kaneki’s lips, asking for entrance, immediately granted. Kaneki could only cling on for dear life as Hide deepened the kiss. The kiss was better than any book description he had ever read. There was something so adrenaline rushing about kissing an extremely attractive man who he had met a few hours ago.

Kaneki’s hands wandered up in to Hide’s hair as the others wandered down his backside. Kaneki gasped into the kiss and tugged on his hair. Hide groaned and licked his way through Kaneki’s mouth in return. After kissing for what seemed like ages (because it probably was) he became uncomfortably hard in his tight jeans and had to break the kiss to have air.

“Wow…” Hide puffed his cheeks. “Have you kissed before?” He gushed. Kaneki shook his head, forgetting how to use his mouth. “You must be a natural then.” Hide leaned down to plant a kiss on Kaneki’s lips, then another and another until they were fully making out again.

“What’s the time?” Kaneki questioned once they broke apart again, arms still around Hide’s neck. Hide lifted his hand off Kaneki’s behind to check his wrist, Kaneki whined in protest.

“It’s twenty past one.” Hide coughed, trying to hold back his laughter after noticing Kaneki’s previous noise. Kaneki almost jumped out of his skin when he registered what had been said.

“Crap! I need to find my friends!” Kaneki released himself from Hide and turned to run but, he almost collapsed from fatigue before he could take another step. Luckily Hide, his knight in shining armour, was there to catch him before he could fall.

“Be careful, Kaneki.” Hide huffed while bringing Kaneki back to his knees. “Let me help you find them.” Kaneki looked at him surprised. When he saw the genuine concern in Hide’s eyes he nodded curtly and continued to butt his way past all the sweaty bodies. After escaping the horde, Kaneki lead the way to the stairs leading to the second floor. While ascending the stairs he felt eyes on his back and he blushed hard.

“Hide, stop staring at my bum!” Kaneki whisper shouted, trying to cool his face.

“Don’t blame me! Blame you and your pretty ass!” Hide answered, not taking his eyes away.

“You pervert.” Kaneki accused under his breath but, making sure it was loud enough for the other to here. Hide grinned and zipped his mouth shut. When they reached the second floor, Kaneki searched for Touka who he had left there.

“Tou-!“ Kaneki cut himself off when he realised what his friend was doing. Hide behind him looked over his shoulder. The floor was now empty except for two figures on a couch.

“Whoa! I didn't know Yoriko had it in her.” He gawked. Touka had her arm around Yoriko possessively while having a, quite intense, make out session. They pulled apart when they realised that two boys were staring wide eyed at them.

“Oh! Kaneki, you finally came back.” Touka drawled. Yoriko covered her red face by burying it in Touka’s shoulder. “Wait. Why do you look like-“Touka narrowed her eyes when she spotted the boy, who was currently whistling and looking guiltily away, standing behind him.

“Hide-san!” Yoriko shot up out of her seat, noticing Hide as well. “Sorry, sorry! Please don’t tell the manager I was slacking off.” She begged.

“Yeah, sure. No problem.” He winked. Her face heated as she brushed herself down and returned to the bar. Touka looked pissed off at the fact that Yoriko had left her and so stood up to glare at the two opposite her.

“Kaneki, you didn't have sex already did you?” she chortled, wanting pay-back for them ruining her time with the cute waitress.

“No-“Kaneki tried to deny but, she continued to mock him.

“I saw you staring at him before but I didn't think you meant it like-“

“Touka-chan!” Kaneki squealed, before she could continue saying whatever she was going to say. He cleared his throat and calmed himself down. “It’s late, we need to go.” Touka pouted in response, forgetting that it was way past midnight.

“Fine. But, where is my bastard brother?” she yawned.

“Right here.” Came a voice from behind Kaneki. They all jumped and turned around.

“And where the hell where _you?_ ” Touka snickered. Ayato challenged her with a death stare and looked her up and down.

“I was doing ‘whatever the fuck I want’ and it looks like you did as well.” He cackled as Touka snarled and fixed her hair. When Touka stormed over to Yoriko, Ayato’s eyes wandered back onto the pair of boys in front of him. His smirk became even more devilish.

“Kaneki, see! I knew this outfit would get you laid.” He said proudly. Kaneki put his hands on his face and shook his head. He didn't know why these people were his friends. Hide rubbed his back sympathetically.

“Please can we just go?” Kaneki mumbled miserably.

“Aw are you sick of me already?” Hide asked, taking his hand away from Kaneki.

“N-no Hide, that’s not what I meant.” Kaneki sputtered, turning to him with wide eyes. He really didn't mean it like that. It was the opposite, he really wanted to see Hide again. Hide shook his head with an eyebrow raised.

“Hey, Yoriko! Do you have a pen?” Hide called over his shoulder. Kaneki stood still giving Hide a confused. Yoriko, who was speaking surreptitiously with Touka, threw a pen from her jacket pocket without looking. Hide caught it easily as Kaneki’s mouth fell open.

“Do you do that often?” Kaneki said astonished.

“Not really. We’re just good friends. However,” Hide said grabbing Kaneki’s hand and taking the pen lid by his mouth. “I don’t do this often.” Kaneki felt the light press of the pen on his hand. He was about to question it but, faltered when he realised Hide was giving him his phone number.

“Maybe I can teach you more dance moves, if you like?” Hide said with an impish grin, obviously implying more than he said. Kaneki stared lost for words into his eyes.

“O-OK.” He looked away rubbing his neck, Hide brought the hand with the number on to his lips and Kaneki felt as if he would melt into the floor. Hide’s eyes brightened when he saw the way Kaneki’s lips turned upwards.

“Alright, alright! Time’s up, lover boys. Kaneki, say bye to your boyfriend.” Ayato interrupted, having stood with a grimace on his face through the interaction. He grabbed Kaneki’s arm and dragged him down the stairs before a response could be said. “Touka, just ask her out and get your fat arse over here.” He shouted angrily when he noticed that she wasn't with them. After two minutes of them waiting, Ayato grumbling and Kaneki sulking, Touka came down the stairs strangely docile.

“How many boob’s did you end up getting, shitty brother?” She grumbled while walking past them to the exit. Kaneki knew she was trying to bait Ayato into a fight.

“More than you did!” Ayato yelled childishly, crossing his arms and stomping after her. Kaneki rubbed his face and sighed. They were immature as ever.

“Mm, are you sure about that?” She said slyly. “Because I'm pretty sure that _girl_ I saw you speaking to didn't have any.” Ayato’s eyes widened.

“W-what?” He cleared his throat. “Which girl?” He said, putting on a manly façade. He actually didn't know what Touka was getting at.

“You know… the one with the white hair, androgynous looking.” She answered offhandedly.

“…Androgynous?” Ayato looked like he was going to vomit.

“Yep. That was obviously a guy, stupid.” Touka grinned at Kaneki, who was trying not to laugh at Ayato’s misfortune. “That means I win, brother.” All she received was a pinch to her arm in return.

“Where’s Shitty Nishiki?” Ayato said in a desperate attempt to change the subject. Touka shrugged and Kaneki almost did the same before remembering his conversation with Kimi.

“Kimi told me ages ago that he left.” He stated as the club became a distant building. Hardly anyone was out now and Kaneki grimly thought about how the sky was already turning a dark blue.

“Good. We didn't wait for him anyway.” They reached the bus station which was where Touka was going to leave them.

“Well, it was nice going out with you losers, and by nice I mean god awful. I'm never getting tricked into coming with you again Ayato.” She called while walking off onto her bus. Ayato shook his head and signalled for Kaneki to speed up.

They walked in silence, Kaneki thinking about gold eyes and freckled skin, until they reached the dorms. Kaneki automatically went into his room without saying anything to Ayato, who was extremely insulted.

“OK then. Go text your boyfriend of five minutes or whatever. Ignore the guy who got you laid, I get it.” He scoffed, slamming his bedroom door shut.

Kaneki paced the room and paid him no mind, to busy worrying if he should text now or later. He has never been romantically involved with someone before. Is it too soon? He tried thinking back to the few romance novels he had read.

_Damn, I really should have paid more attention to that rom-com Ayato forced me to watch with him._

Kaneki decided he would just text Hide and get it over with. There’s no point staring at the number on his hand forever. He jumped on to his bed and grabbed his phone. Sweaty palms shakily clutched the phone as he saved the number.

 **TO:** _Attractive Blond Stranger_

**FROM: _Ken_**

_2:23 am_

      _**How long is someone supposed to wait to text a person who gave them their number?**_

Kaneki didn't have to wait long before a beep came from his phone.

 

 

_2:25 am_

      _Forty minutes is a good amount of time. ;)_

_But two in the morning isn't really the most practical._

 

_2:26 am_

_**OH my god. I'm so sorry! Were you sleeping? This is Hide right?** _

 

_2:26 am_

_No this is Dog. Nah, I'm just kidding. XD I'm still at the bar. Technically I shouldn't be texting you rn because I should be working… but anything for you Ken._

_BTW I was being serious about my offer from before._

Kaneki’s cheeks grew hot. Did he want to learn ‘more dance moves’?

_…YES, obviously._

 

_2:27 am_

      _**What would you teach me if I took the offer?**_

 

_2:28 am_

        _…many things ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_

 

2:28 am

        _**HIDE!**_

 

_2:29 am_

_( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )_

 

_2:29 am_

_**SERIOUSLY?!**_

 

_2:30 am_

 

_I am a man of many talents._

_You should come back tomorrow and see them._

 

He dug his head into his bed, rolled around and squealed in excitement. His insides warmed at the shameless flirting he was a subject of.

 

_2:30 am_

          _ **Ok ok. I’ll come back.**_

 

Kaneki didn't receive a reply for quite some time and he decided that he would get ready and actually try to get some sleep instead of pulling an all-nighter. Only when he was ready to drop onto his bed and fall straight asleep did he receive a reply. He squinted at his phone with tired eyes.

 

_2:55 am_

            _Cool! Sorry, I got caught by Rize so I had to return to work._

 

_2:55 am_

_**That’s OK, I was just going to sleep.** _

 

_2:57 am_

_Shit. I shouldn't have disturbed you. Sorry._

_Also tomorrow you can come at like 6 pm. (I'm not going to make you come early after going to sleep so late.) :)_

 

_2:59am_

              _**nszxzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz**_

 

_3:00 am_

_Kaneki? ◉_◉_

_XD that’s cute. Have sweet dreams (of me) Ken._

 

And Kaneki did.

 

(Have sweet dreams, of course. _Definitely_ not of the very good looking man he just met.)

 

 

(OK maybe he did.)


	2. Extra Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Contrary to popular belief, Kaneki was actually taught how to dance.

"Sexy! Move those hips!"

"You're so embarrassing Hide!"

"What? This is part of the learning process."

Kaneki groaned out loud, dragging his hands down his face. He stopped moving and gave Hide his best ' _I'm so done._ ' look. Contrary to popular belief (Ayato and Touka teasing him non-stop), Kaneki was actually taught how to dance when he came back. It was some weird salsa dance that Hide had been taught previously.

They were currently standing on the main stage of the club, dancing in front of an invisible audience. Which was good, Kaneki thought, because he didn't need anyone watching and getting second hand embarrassment from what he was going through.

Hide sighed through his nose and shook his head at Kaneki. "You decided to come, Kaneki. What else did you think we were going to do here." he said with a lopsided grin, the slight wiggle of his eyebrows indicated to Kaneki that Hide _knew_  just how suggestive he was being. Kaneki rolled his eyes and grabbed onto Hide's arms once again.

"Nothing..." Kaneki sighed. "Are we going to do it again or not?"

"You're a bit eager." Hide teased lifting his eyebrows. Kaneki looked away with a huff and squeezed Hide's arms. "OK. Again, one, two, three, four,"

Hide grabbed onto Kaneki's hips and moved them from side to side as Kaneki recounted the steps. Although they had bickered almost every time they had paused, Hide had managed to teach Kaneki almost the full dance in the two hours he had been here. Hide's grip on him gradually loosened until he let go completely, no longer guiding Kaneki how to move his hips. Kaneki struggled at continuing to dance without help at first, but soon he could feel himself relaxing into the strange foreign music being played.

"Yes! You've done it 'Neki." Hide exploded, clapping his hands as Kaneki reached the stage they had got up to in the dance. 

Kaneki looked up from his feet to see Hide hypnotised by his swaying hips. "Careful, you're drooling." Kaneki giggled before stopping his movements. His laughter grew louder when Hide reached up to wipe his mouth.

"Ha, very funny." Hide frowned. "You have improved though." He reached up to brush Kaneki's sweaty bangs away from his face. Hide's hand ran softly through the soft white hair before cupping his cheek.

"Maybe I should get a reward for this?" Kaneki suggested, shifting even closer to him and leaning his head into the hand. 

"Your reward..." Kaneki's sharp breaths hitched when he saw brown eyes darkening. Their lips were only a centimetre apart, Kaneki could succumb to his desire and just lean forward and connect them. However, before he could Hide pulled away abruptly. " is to learn the lift in the dance." 

Kaneki stood confused for a full minute before growing red. Hide had both his hands covering his mouth and Kaneki could clearly see his shoulders shaking.

"Sure."

Hide composed himself before speaking."Hmm, is that the reward you wanted?"

Kaneki thought for another minute before replying "No."

Brown eyes widened. "Oh really? Well, that's a shame. I can't think of a better reward." Hide burst out laughing at the glare Kaneki sent his way.

"Whatever. How are we going to do this lift." Kaneki just wanted to get this over and done with.

"You just have to jump onto me at the end."

Kaneki blinked.

"Look, come here." Hide motioned him to come forward. "All you have to do is jump high enough so your legs wrap around my waist."

"...Right."

"It's easy, just think of it like your desperately trying to get me to bed you."

"HIDE!" Kaneki turned away from him and put his hands in his hair. He could hear Hide snorting behind him.

"What? That shouldn't be hard since you want me to anyway." Kaneki turned around to slap him. Hide dodged, Kaneki saw the shit eating grin on his face.

"I wish I never came."

"Ow, don't say that." Hide smothered his laughter when Kaneki wouldn't respond. "I'm sorry. Please look at me." He grabbed Kaneki's shoulders and tried to turn him but, he wouldn't budge.

"No."

Hide moved to stand in front of Kaneki. Kaneki turned himself the other way. This ended up becoming a endless cycle of them rotating. It was almost like they were doing another dance.

"I said I'm sorry!"

"I don't forgive you." Kaneki pouted. He had already forgiven Hide a long time ago but, he would never admit that.

"C'mon, we've almost finished the dance." Hide tried before giving up. He couldn't tell whether Kaneki was actually upset or not. "Ken, please." Hide would eat his shoe if this didn't work. 

"..." Kaneki faltered at the use of his first name. _Damn him._

Hide internally congratulated himself when he saw Kaneki slowly turn towards him. He was about to apologise again when he received a punch to his gut. 

"I forgive you now." Kaneki grinned smugly, looking down at where Hide had fallen.

"Wow. You really know how to pack a punch." Hide moaned, clutching his stomach before standing up.

"You deserved it, stupid."

"I deserved it." Hide repeated, trying more to convince himself than Kaneki. "Anyway, let's do the lift." Kaneki nodded and stood himself in front of Hide.

"So, basically I just jump onto you?" Kaneki asked, worrying about if he will fall or something.

"Yes. Don't worry, I'll catch you." Hide answered, as if he heard Kaneki's internal panicking. Kaneki grabbed onto Hide's shoulders and jumped with his jaw clenched. Hide caught him with no trouble and Kaneki quickly wrapped his legs around him.

"See? You've done it." Hide beamed up at him. Kaneki opened his eyes and looked at the position they were in with a burning face. "Relax, Kaneki. There's nothing embarrassing about a bit of male on male contact." he was swiftly kicked by a foot linked behind his back.

"Idiot." Kaneki poked Hide's face, avoiding eye contact.

"Do you have a flexible back?" Hide asked out of nowhere. Kaneki shook his head, confused.

"I don't know. Why?"

 "Because at the end you're supposed to bend all the way back." _Oh god._

"Oh god." Kaneki repeated out loud.

"Just try it."

Kaneki shook his head again. No way was he going to risk breaking his back for a silly dance.

"Pretty please." Hide fluttered his eyelashes at him. Kaneki found his eyes darting between Hide and the nearest exit. Hide suddenly squeezed his thighs and Kaneki let out a small squeak.

"OK!" Kaneki squealed when the touch continued. He really didn't need to get _excited_  while doing this.

"Yay! I'll help you. Just slowly lean back." Kaneki made sure to give Hide the most deadly glare before leaning himself back. Soon, Kaneki found himself looking around upside down, his head almost touching the floor. "Whoa! Ken, you're a natural."

Kaneki was becoming dizzier by the second as he felt blood rush to his head. "Yeah, that's great. Can you lift me back up now." Hide complied while chuckling.

"In the actual dance, you'll have to do it faster," Kaneki blanched at the thought. "but it will be easy for you."

"That's it?"

"Yeah. By the way, that didn't hurt did it?" 

Kaneki hesitated. His body grew uncomfortably warm as he saw the concern in Hide's face."No, I didn't" His lips twitched upwards.

"Cool. Now let's do the whole thing."

Hide ran to restart the music and they stood in their starting positions, grinning at each other. They ran through the whole routine and yes, Kaneki remembered to move his hips and move the right foot backwards first. It turned out that they were in perfect sync and as Kaneki spun around and moved his arms, Hide was always there to catch him and bring them into the next move. The moved all around the dance floor, never wavering, until the ended up back on the middle. Kaneki jumped and wrapped his legs around Hide's waist as he was told to and was instantly leant back and then up.

The music ended and the only sound from the room was there breaths. 

"We did it!" Hide howled suddenly, his head raised to the roof. Kaneki laughed as Hide ran around the stage still holding him. Only when they calmed down did they hear distant clapping. They turned to see two figure standing near the entrance.

"Wow. Kaneki-kun, you should take my place." A female voice said. Their eyes widened as the two people came out from the shadows.

"Rize-san! Tsukiyama-san!" Hide shouted in disbelief. "You creeps! How long have you been here for?" He wondered if they had seen the whole dance. Kaneki saw the woman, who danced with Hide when Kaneki came before, give him an approving glance. 

 _How did she know my name?_ , Kaneki thought. He realised Hide must of gone on and on about him to her. _So embarrassing..._

"Since you started the performance. It was _extraordinaire!_ " spoke the guy Kaneki recognised as the announcer who worked at the club. 

"Yeah, I know." Hide bragged, looking at Kaneki proudly. Kaneki looked away sheepishly.

"Ah! Me and Tsukiyama will be in the dressing rooms if you need us," Rize smirked, making a show of looking up and down at the two on stage. "it looks like you need time... alone." She winked before dragging Tsukiyama, who's eyes where glazed over in admiration, into a back room." Kaneki didn't understand what she had meant until he look at the position him and Hide still in.

"Um... Hide."

"Hm?"

"You can let me go now."

"No." Hide dug his face into Kaneki's front. Kaneki grabbed Hide by his hair and pulled him away until they were staring eye to eye. Kaneki couldn't look away, even when he felt a blush growing on his face.

"I think I deserve another reward." Kaneki whispered, his thumb tracing Hide's lips.

"Yeah, you do. I'll even be kind and let you choo-mm" Hide was unable to finish his sentence because Kaneki had already dived into the kiss. The stayed motionless for a heartbeat before Kaneki grabbed the sides of Hide's face and deepened the kiss. Hide, again, rubbed his thighs and Kaneki shifted when hand's trailed up onto his butt. 

Kaneki broke from the kiss panting. Hide without opening his eyes, chased Kaneki for another kiss. He was met with a cheek instead of the lips he intended to get.

"Hey!" Hide's eyes flew open and he puffed out his cheeks, disappointed.

Kaneki leant his face away and raised his eyebrows. "I'm getting the reward. Not you." He reminded, pinching Hide's cheeks.

"Huh? I thought you wanted a kiss?" Hide whined, trying to capture Kaneki's lips.

"No. You know how I love to see you suffer." Kaneki grinned down at Hide.

"'Neki!" 

"Hid-mmph"

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to continue this a bit more so.... here you go! (Don't look at me)
> 
> I've already written another story but, I'm too scared to post it . It might be up sometime near the end of the week (hopefully).
> 
> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) - I just love this face. Sorry.


	3. Hello Barbie, Lets go Party.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hide is invited to a party.  
> Kaneki regrets, a lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 100+ KUDOS omg! Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you! x10000000000
> 
> I can't believe people liked this so much. So thank you... aaaah! (spontaneously combusts)
> 
> I had to write another chapter to celebrate (originally it was going to be a Christmas party but, its way after December now. Oh well.)
> 
> It's a bit smutty, but its kind of not because I'm so bad at writing smut. Enjoy!

Hide woke up.

 

 

 

There was nothing unusual about that.

Except for the fact that it definitely wasn’t in his bed and something, which felt suspiciously like a leg, was squishing his waist.

And yeah… he was very naked.

_This is just like some stupid rom-com._

Hide groaned and pulled himself into a sitting position. His eyes adjusted to the bright sunlight flooding the room through the window.

A fancy looking dresser and wardrobe stood on one side of the room and a giant fancy looking painting was hung beside what looked like a door to a bathroom. And, _wow_ , the room was massive, he thought while trying to remember what had happened last night.

Wait… fancy things could only mean one thing.

Hide face palmed. _This is Tsukiyama’s house of course! Ouch._ The sound of his hand slapping skin echoing around the large room brought his attention back to the body lying next to him.

“Fuck. Please don’t be a random stranger. Oh god. What am I gonna tell ‘Neki, man.” Hide mumbled worriedly while trying to subtly peak under the covers. “I must have been drunk off my ass. Shit.”

Slowly he peeled the covers off to reveal a mass of white hair and a lot of skin. Hide’s eyes widened from relief and mortification.

“Kaneki!”

He immediately shook Kaneki frantically. The white haired man stirred and tried slapping Hide away pathetically.

“Mm, five more minutes.” Kaneki grumbled into the pillow. When the shaking refused to stop his eyes flew open in irritation. “OK I’M-!” Kaneki’s words died off when he saw his boyfriend staring at him with wide eyes. “Hide?”

“Ken… what the hell happened last night?”

 

_**.o.** _

 

_2 days before…_

 

“Hey Kaneki, guess what?”

Kaneki looked up from his coffee unimpressed.

“What?”

“I said guess.”

“Well I don’t know.”

Hide grinned and leaned in on his arms “Aw c’mon. You’re not even trying.”

“Just tell me before I regret agreeing to come here with you.” Kaneki went back to looking at his coffee like it contained something more interesting than Hide.

“Oi!

“There’s some kind of party happening.”  Kaneki deadpanned and took another sip from the coffee.

“Bingo!” Hide shouted before Kaneki kicked his leg telling him to be quiet. They were in a public place, Anteiku, after all. “It’s not just any party either. It’s Tsukiyama-san’s party.” Kaneki shrugged and turned to look for an escape from this man.

“I’m not going.”

“WHAT!? You have to come with me!” Hide pouted and grabbed Kaneki’s hands across the table before the other could run off.

“Not interested.” Kaneki wasn’t outgoing at all. NO way was he going to go to some party hosted by a man he didn’t really know. He was already having premonitions of how the party would go down; Hide gets drunk, Kaneki has to look after him, Hide does something stupid anyway.

Hide could see the way Kaneki’s face grew dark. “But, it’s gonna be awesome. He’s got a massive house!”

“Exactly why I’m not going.”

“Aw…” Hide let the conversation drop off, but he saw Touka approaching them from the corner of his eye and visibly perked up.

Hide waved at her and didn’t let her scowl put him off. “Hey Touka-“

“Shut up.” She turned towards Kaneki, who was now fairly amused at the two’s interaction (was it too short to even be called that?). “Kaneki, is this man causing you any trouble?” She completely ignored Hide’s squawk of disbelief.

“Yes. He’s pressuring me into going with him to a party.” Kaneki didn’t look at Hide’s face of betrayal.

“I’m not. It’s just-“He made puppy eyes at the waitress and tried to grab onto her desperately.

“Hide, I’m going to have to ask you to leave-“ Hide shot out of his seat, causing other customers to look at their table.

“No! Please, I’m sorry. Wait, stop hitting m-“

Kaneki watched as Hide started fending off Touka’s punches and decided it was time to stop this. “It’s OK Touka-chan. We’re leaving now anyway.” He made sure to glare at Hide pointedly.

The two… _children_ stopped fighting and Hide looked at Kaneki in confusion. “We are?”

Kaneki stood up and grabbed Hide’s arm harshly, pulling him out the shop quickly. “Yes. This is why I don’t go out with you.” Hide whined and hung his head in shame. However, his attempt to be cute didn’t work on Kaneki anymore. “Stop acting like a brat.”

“No.”

“Oh my God.”

 

 

**_. O. _ **

**__ **

 

So, it turns out Hide’s attempts at being cute did work on Kaneki.

And Kaneki did end up going to the party.

…

_He hates Hide so much._

 

Said man was currently drunk off his ass dancing to some weird k-pop song in the middle of a crowd cat-calling and watching him. Kaneki was silently fuming in the corner of the room, however he still checked to see if Hide was going to fall off the chair he was standing on.

(He would never admit that, even when drunk, Hide’s dance skills were hypnotising.)

Suddenly, the song changed to something slower and everyone cheered as Hide started body rolling on the makeshift platform he stood on. Kaneki felt hot as he watched the show; somehow he felt like Hide knew he was watching and purposefully did this for him to see. He shook the thought away, finding it absurd and desperate.

A waiter came around with drinks and snacks and Kaneki quickly took a shot of… something alcoholic. Previously he said that he wouldn’t drink, but for some reason he felt like he had to, to survive the long party.

__

_**. X.** _

 

Minutes turned into hours and Hide still continued to dance teasingly in front of the ever growing crowd. Now, most of the people invited to the party had come to beg Hide to either dance with them or placed bets on how much Hide could drink before falling off the chair.

 

Kaneki felt a bit tipsy but it was nothing compared to the twenty cans of beer Hide had drunk in the time they had been here. Hide was dangerously close to collapsing since he had been dancing for almost all the time and was completely smashed.

“Drink! Drink! Drink!” People chanted as someone handed Hide another can, which was downed it in less than 30 seconds. Hide wobbled and he chair almost tipped over from the weight being unbalanced. Kaneki decided that he couldn’t stand being here anymore and pushed his way through the crowd to the middle, where Hide had practically passed out standing up.

“Excuse me. Sorry-“ Kaneki bumped into a few of the many people dancing around him and reached Hide in time for him to fall of the chair. Kaneki quickly reached out and caught him, almost falling down from how heavy he was.

Hide grinned when he was being steadied be no other than his saviour boyfriend. “OH! Kane-ki! I miss’d youuuuww.” Kaneki pulled Hide away from the room and ignored the sound of people Aww-ing at the kidnapping of their prime entertainment.

“Yeah, we’re going now.” Kaneki breathed in the fresh(er), less stuffy air of the hallway and led Hide to the upstairs area, which he found when he went for a toilet break.

“Mm, ‘Neki, ‘m tired” Hide kept slipping from Kaneki’s hold and his eyes were drooping so low that Ken wondered if he was even looking where they were going.

“Hmm, I think there must be bedrooms somewhere.” Kaneki tried one door hurriedly and when he saw it was in fact a bedroom he wiped his forehead in relief. However, when he took a step into the room, he saw movement and groaning coming from under the covers of the bed. “Shit!” he squeaked before backing himself and Hide out of the room. His face grew hot and he willed for it to calm down.

Kaneki pulled Hide to another room quite a bit further down the hall and checked whether it was a bedroom (and empty) before entering. He panted and went to sit on the bed before falling back onto it. “Hide I’m never coming to a party with you again.”

When the room remained silent, Kaneki pulled himself onto his elbows to see what Hide was doing. The other didn’t even look like he’d registered Kaneki’s words, his eyes glazed over and staring at Kaneki’s position on the bed.

“We should do what those people were doing in the other room.” Hide mumbled, strangely sobered up. Kaneki was confused for a moment.

“What-? OH!” Kaneki turned over and buried his face in the covers, refusing to meet Hide’s eyes. He heard the sound of movement heading his direction and hands grabbed his waist and turned him over.

“Kaneki…” Hide’s eyes searched his before leaning down to kiss him on the corner of his lips. Kaneki shut his eyes tightly, hands shaking as they were taken into rougher ones. He whined and turned his head slightly so their lips would meet. A sigh escaped his lips and a tongue licked his mouth open to ravish the inside.

Kaneki broke the kiss as it started to become heated. “H-Hide… We shouldn’t be doing this. You’re so drunk.” He breathed harshly and Hide only moved to capture his lips once again. The kiss tasted like alcohol and burned his skin red. Hide’s hands moved to under his shirt and gripped his hips. Hide changed their positions so that he was sitting on the bed with Kaneki on his lap.

“Can I?” Hide had his hands on the hem of Kaneki’s shirt.

“…Yes.”

After that all, clothes were torn and throw off. Kissing turned desperate and hands roamed over Kaneki’s body greedily. When they were both fully exposed, Kaneki realised something _very_ important.

“Wait, wait!” The lips that sucked on the skin at his neck stopped moving. The only sound in the room was Kaneki’s harsh breathing. “We don’t have any…” embarrassed, he let his sentence trail off. Hide lifted his head to look in his eyes before placing his thumb on Kaneki’s lips, stroking them softly.

Kaneki’s breath hitched and Hide’s thumb slowly pushed it way into his hot mouth, other hand wandering its way down to Kaneki’s member. Kaneki gasped and licked the thumb in his mouth, eyes closing in ecstasy.

He licked the digit in his mouth generously and an eye cracked open when another joined the first. Hide was sucking ravenously at his collar, making the other gasp out in surprise, heat pooling in his stomach.

Kaneki couldn’t help but think that this was going to be a bit more painful than last time.

 

_**.o.** _

 

“…”

“Wait. So you’re telling me that we had sex and I don’t remember any of it?”

“HIDE! Is that seriously all you got from that?” Kaneki huffed and turned his head away from the grinning blond. He willed for his blush not to betray his annoyance.

Hide however immediately spotted the flushed skin and his grin grew even wider.

“But, you must remember all of it, right?”

“Hide. No.”

“So you do!” Hide yelled while leaning towards his boyfriend, intrigued. Kaneki moved away from him but, much to his annoyance, Hide still came closer until his face was mere centimetres away.

“Go away.” Kaneki drew the covers over his face and gripped it tightly. Hide pouted and moved to get off the bed.

“I’m just teasing you, Kaneki. It’s just a shame I don’t remember making sweet drunk love to you.” Hide picked his boxers off the floor and put them on. He shrugged off the question of how they were lying by the door.

Kaneki had to push the covers from his face because his body was on fire. _Sweet is one way of describing it_ , he thought wryly.

“We’ve had sex sober before. Why do you care?”

Hide gasped and turned around with his hands on his hips.

“Kaneki Ken! I cherish every time we join as one-“

“Oh my god. Stop.”

“-It doesn’t matter if we are drunk, sober, on the couch, at the dinner table-“

“HIDE!”

“What?”

Kaneki puffed out his cheeks and eyed Hide’s defensive stance, which was basically him standing half naked in the middle of the room with his arms crossed.

“Just put your clothes on.”

“What’s the magic word?”

“W-What?”

“Beep, Beep, Beep. Wrong.”

Kaneki rolled his eyes and Hide stared at him expectantly.

“OK alright… Please?”

“See that wasn’t so-“

Hide put on his clothes silently after he saw the glare directed at him.

 

.o.

 

“So, I found Tsukiyama.”

“Hmm.” Kaneki rolled over to face Hide, who had almost broken the door when he slammed it open. Hide had swiftly gone to search for the man after getting dressed.

“He’s making breakfast for any leftover people with hangovers. Well not him personally, his servants, but you know what I mean.”

“Hmm.” Hide raised an eyebrow at the response.

“Are you OK? Why aren’t you dressed?” Hide went to sit on the bed next to Kaneki. Hide had to lean closer to hear the incoherent mumbling. “What?”

Kaneki wished Hide could mind read at this moment in time. “…hurts.” The room was quiet for a moment and Kaneki refused to look in any direction more than 90 degrees to Hide.

“Shit! I’m sorry, fuck!” Hide pulled Kaneki up, covers falling to around his waist, and embraced him. “Are you bleeding? It was last night wasn't it, please don't kill me. Kill drunk Hide.” Kaneki rolled his eyes and met Hide’s regretful expression.

“Hide I’m not dying. I’m just a bit sore.” When Hide didn’t take away his puppy eyes, Kaneki pecked him softly on the lips.

“Are you not mad at me then?” Hide whined, pulling Kaneki even closer so that his bare chest was completely smothered.

“No, silly.” Kaneki smiled and wrapped his arms around Hide’s neck. “I… actually kind of liked it.” When the hand rubbing his back stilled, he tensed up. _Why did I say that, now he'll think I'm some creepy masochist?_

He felt Hide shaking, and was almost about to ask what’s wrong, when suddenly a loud laugh burst from his lips.

“Kaneki, I didn’t know you were into that!” Hide giggled between breaths, head thrown back. “You should’ve told me before.”

Kaneki hit Hide’s back, surprising the man, and escaped from his hold through the distraction. He ran to the bathroom and locked the door behind him, ignoring the protests coming from the other side of the door.

“Ken, I’m sorry.” Kaneki could hear the pout more than see it. Suppressing his own grin and ignoring the banging on the door, he called back to Hide, who was now crying out apologies profusely.

 

“I hate you.”

 

 

_I love you._

 

 

_**. O.** _

 

 

“So, next time should we try whips?”

“No.”

“Collars?”

“…”

“Spank-“

“Shut up, Hide.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mmmmmhmmmm


	4. Idoit2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hide hides because Ayato has no chill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what is this

 

 

 

 

_From:  Dork1_

_To:   **Dork2**_

 

_Yo! Can you open your door for me (⌐▨_▨)_

 

 

Kaneki looked down at his phone and found a number of things suspicious about the text he had just received while he was sitting on the couch watching a random cooking show ( _what!_ He's only watching it because Hide said he'd like it).

 

  
_1._ Why had his contact details mysteriously changed to " ** _Dork2_** " and Hide's (he had to check that it was in fact Hide's number) to " _Dork1_ "?

 

  
_2._ Why couldn't Hide function like a normal human being and knock?

 

  
_3._ Why did he have to use such a weird emoji (that's suspicious enough in itself!)?

 

Kaneki exhaled and switched off the TV. He always had to deal with Hide's foolery, it's just what came with the " _Dating Hideyoshi Nagachika"_ package (Hide's words not his) so this was nothing new in his opinion. Getting up from his comfortable position on the couch, Kaneki padded his way down the corridor to the entrance of his dorm.

 

He opened the door with an irritated expression on his face, but it momentarily switched to one of shock as he saw what was waiting for him behind the door.

 

"What-?!" A hand reached up and covered his mouth, his eyes widened and he was swiftly pushed back so that Hide could enter.

 

" _Shhh!_ " Hide put a finger to his lips and closed the door softly with his foot "I don't want _him_ to know I'm here." He whisper shouted, causing Kaneki to narrow his eyes and slap the hand covering his mouth away.

 

"Hide, what the- what are you wearing and _why_?" Kaneki motioned to the black sunglasses and dark hoodie hiding Hide's face (that emoji was starting to look a lot like him).

 

"I'm going _undercover!_ " Kaneki snorted and reached up to take the sunglasses of Hide's face,  "Wait- no give them back." Kaneki pocketing the glasses in his back pocket so that Hide, who was desperately trying to snatch them back, couldn't grab them from him.

 

"First, tell me why on earth your doing this." Kaneki raised an eyebrow expectantly. Hide scratched the back of his neck nervously and his eyes darted down the corridor warily.

 

" _Ayato_." Hide spat out eventually, like it was the devil's name and not Kaneki's dorm mate's.

 

"What about him?" Kaneki asked, turning around to go back to the couch, however a hand snatching his arm prevented him from going anywhere.

 

"Is _he_ here?" Hide pulled Kaneki towards him protectively. 

 

"No. Ayato is not here, Hide." 

 

"Oh thank fuck!" Hide breathed, he then went to move down the hallway dragging the Kaneki with him.

 

"W-what, Hide! You know I _was_ doing stuff before you came here." Kaneki protested as he was forced to go into his bedroom and Hide hummed in acknowledgement.

 

"Yeah _sure_ , you were probably watching crap daytime TV or something." He said distractedly as he shut the bedroom door behind them, Kaneki tsked and turned his head away in shame. _Damn, he knows me too well._  "Anyway, we're doing something different now."

 

"And what's that?" 

 

"...Not getting caught by Ayato." He said uncertainly and pushed his hood down. Kaneki stared appreciatively at Hide's ponytail.

 

"Can I ask why you're hiding from him?" He saw Hide tense and narrowed his eyes in suspicion.

 

"W-well," Hide scratched his cheek and forced a laugh "it's actually quite funny..."

 

"Hide." Kaneki warned, putting a hand on his hip "Just say it." Hide cleared his throat.

 

"Remember last time I came here," Kaneki thought back to two days prior, when Hide came to his dorm on his day off work to watch a movie, and nodded. "You know how you went out to get pizza and left me here?"  Kaneki nodded again, but slower because he now feared the worst. "Well I-I kindofneededtousethebathroombutthenendedupwalkinginonAyatodancingnaked!" Hide rushed, gasping for breath afterwards.

 

Kaneki blinked. " _What-_ "

 

"I _saw Ayato's penis_!" Hide cried out and Kaneki froze. Dragging his hands down his face, Hide remembered the horror of walking in on Ayato, naked as the day he was born, wiggling about to some mainstream hip hop song with dancing skills so terrible that Hide _almost_ gave him professional dancing advice. "I _saw it_  flapping about and-and he said he would kill me if I came to your dorm again- but it's not _my_ fault- like who doesn't lock the bathroom door when they're dancing nak-"

 

"So that's why you looked sick when I came back." Kaneki realised with a gasp before bursting out laughing, clutching his stomach. " _Oh- oh my god, Hide!"_ Kaneki hiccuped, tears forming in the corners of his eyes, and he placed a hand on Hide's cheek, stroking it feigning affection. " _My poor baby_ , you must have been traumatised." However, when Hide looked at him with pain- _pain_  in his eyes, Kaneki couldn't hold in another spurt of laughter.

 

Hide pouted and turned his head the other way. "You may find it funny now, but it wasn't and still isn't funny for me." Kaneki sobered up, a smile still evident on his lips, and cooed. "That dancing was awful."

 

" _Aww,_  do you want me to make it better?" Kaneki pulled Hide down so that he could place his lips on Hide's pouting ones. When the Hide refused to respond, Kaneki pulled away with a huff. "Hide, I'm sorry for laughing." He said sincerely. Hide puffed his cheeks and Kaneki poked them teasingly. "Surely there's only one penis that your interested in seeing?"

 

"Yeah," Hide chuckled, honey eyes looking down at Kaneki. "That's true." He pulled Kaneki flush against himself and dived down for a kiss, which was returned without hesitation. Kaneki moaned softly as Hide further deepened the kiss, tongue flicking out to lick his mouth open. They stumbled towards Kaneki's bed clumsily, not wanting to break the kiss, and after a few steps the back of Kaneki's legs hit the edge of the bed, causing him to fall back onto the bed with an " _Oof"._

"Hide, what if-?" Kaneki eyes almost popped out of his head as he watched Hide, who still was standing at the edge of the bed, remove every piece of clothing he had on except for his boxers. Kaneki felt his mouth become dry, the sight of Hide's bare abs making him blush like a schoolgirl even though he has seen it many times before (sometimes he thanks the heavens that Hide does dancing.)

 

"Might as well not drag it out." Hide grinned devilishly, crawling in between Kaneki's legs. "Do you know when _Ayato_ comes back?" He trailed his hands down Kaneki's sides before slipping them under his shirt.

 

"I don't know..." Kaneki helped Hide taking off his shirt, throwing it onto the floor, and hurriedly shoved his trousers off, Hide immediately going to mouth his way down Kaneki's pale stomach. "I don't _care_." He panted out as he felt hot wet kisses being pressed against his skin. His hands wandered into Hide's hair and pulled the tie out, the soft blond locks falling around Hide's neck, making it easier for Kaneki to grip.

 

One kiss particularly close to his _downstairs area_ made Kaneki squeeze his eyes close and tug Hide's hair. "When was the last- the last time we did this?" Kaneki choked out between a moan, Hide pressed a kiss to Kaneki's clothed member, fingers itching to pull the pants off, before looking up at him.

 

"Two weeks." He mumbled after a moment of contemplation. "We did it in the bathroom at Antei-" Kaneki slapped a hand over Hide's grinning face.

 

"OK! I remember now. Just continue." Hide snickered before pulling down Kaneki's briefs, flushed member staring him in the face. "Are you just going to stare or what?" Kaneki grumbled after a minute of Hide not doing _anything_ , embarrassed.

 

Hide licked his lips, mouth hovering over the head of the shaft, "You were right." Kaneki pinched his eyebrows together and looked down. "This _is_ the only penis that I want to-"

 

They both froze as they heard the jingle of keys turning in a lock.

 

 

They still didn't move as they heard the sound of a door opening and closing violently.

 

 

They only moved when they heard a muffled " _KANEKI!_ " from outside the bedroom.

 

" _Fuck-"_

" _Oh no-_ "

 

Hide scrambled into a standing position, Kaneki's briefs still in hand. "I _have_ to hide." He whispered. Kaneki scrambled under his duvet to cover his bare body, then suddenly had an idea.

 

"Quick." He raised the duvet and motioned frantically to the spot next to him. "Under here." Hide paused, eyeing the impromptu hiding place with unease, but when he heard the sound of footsteps stomping down the hall, he jumped in and allowed Kaneki to cover him.

 

"How will I be able to breath under here-" 

 

"It's better than getting murdered by Ayato." Kaneki pulled Hide towards his body and fluffed out the covers so it looked like he was the only one in the bed. Hide's head, which was pressed into Kaneki's stomach, thrashed around uncomfortably.

 

"Oh shit." Hide quickly moved away from Kaneki, remembering his clothes that he had thrown off. Sticking his hand out of the bed, he blindly felt around the floor for his clothes until he found them and brushed them underneath the bed.

 

"Hide!" Kaneki watched his door with wide eyes, the footsteps becoming louder and louder.

 

"Yeah-" Hide brought his hand back under the duvet and pressed his body back to its position against Kaneki. "OK." He breathed against Kaneki's belly.

 

Kaneki quickly pushed Hide's head further down (" _Ow!_ ") so there was no chance of it being seen under the duvet and placed his head and arms on the pillow in a believable and natural position so Ayato wouldn't have any inkling of Hide's whereabouts.

 

Kaneki jumped, feeling Hide doing the same, when the bedroom door burst open.

 

"Oh." Ayato, still in his (fur) coat and punk boots, halted once he surveyed the bedroom. "You're here." His eyes locked onto Kaneki and narrowed slightly. "Is _that blond brat_ with you?"

 

Kaneki eyes wandered around the room nervously, not meeting Ayato in the eye. "No?" Kaneki almost slapped himself.

 

"I saw his shoes by the door." Kaneki winced as Ayato stepped further into the room. "Why are they there then?" _Kaneki think of something think of something think of something-_ A hand snaked its way around Kaneki's waist and grabbed his ass.

 

" _Eeek_ -" Kaneki coughed, trying to cover his squeal as Ayato's eyes became two slits. "Last w _Eeek-_ heleft them here." Kaneki congratulated himself for thinking of a lie and cursed Hide for distracting him.

 

"I never saw him here last week." _Shit._ Kaneki panicked internally. _Shit shit shit why are you so bad at lying-_ he felt a lick on his belly button and almost jumped out of his skin. "Kaneki what's wrong with y-?"

 

"S-SORRY! I just remembered that-" _THINK_ "that I need the toilet." He gave a laugh that sounded strained even to his own ears. "So please leave... Ha!"

 

"..."

 

Ayato nodded, still not entirely convinced, but luckily he didn't push for more. "Well, I'm going to go back to my room now." He said awkwardly before backing out of Kaneki's bedroom and slamming the door shut behind him.

 

Kaneki waited till he heard the sound of Ayato stomping down the hall and closing his bedroom door before breathing.

 

"Can I come out now?" He heard a muffled voice come from under the cover. Kaneki shoved a hand down the duvet and grabbed Hide by the ear, pulling him up by it. " _Ouch. Ow! ow."_

"You _idiot_." Kaneki growled once he had pulled Hide into a sitting position. "Why would you touch me like that when I'm trying to hide you?"

  
_"_ Do you know how hard it is for me to stay still when your dick is literally in my face?" Hide groaned. "You're lucky I didn't just fuck you while he was there." Kaneki sighed and climbed on Hide's lap.

 

"Well, luckily for us, he's not here anymore..." Kaneki purposefully lowered his head so that he could look through his lashes. "But we need to be _quiet."_ He put a finger to Hide's lips, signalling to the wall separating his and Ayato's bedroom, and smiled slyly. Hide's eyes glazed over, nodding vigorously.

 

" _I can do quiet_."

 

 

 

•••

 

 

 

Kaneki yawned and shut his bedroom door behind him. Hide had wanted a glass of water and Kaneki, like a good boyfriend, had offered to get it for him. He wore only his briefs and Hide's green shirt (even though it hung off his shoulders weirdly) out of decency and walked into the kitchen to grab a glass from the cupboard.

 

"Kaneki have you seen my phone?" The glass almost slipped from his fingers. 

 

"Oh Ayato!" Kaneki scolded himself for forgetting about the purple haired man's existence (he _was_  distracted by _someone_  though). "N-no I haven't seen your phone. Why?" When Ayato stayed quiet, Kaneki turned away from the cupboard to look over his shoulder at the other man. "Ayato-?"

 

" _He's here, isn't he."_ Kaneki watched as Ayato's eyes zeroed in on his neck.

 

What was most worrying was how Ayato hadn't phrased it as a question.

 

Kaneki had two seconds to look down at his neck, seeing wet, bright red bites littering his skin, before Ayato roared and charged down to Kaneki's bedroom.

 

"Ayato!" Kaneki rushed after him, slamming the glass down on the counter on his way out the kitchen. "Please- just wait a second." Catching up to him just before he could enter the bedroom, Kaneki grabbed Ayato's arm and tugged him backwards. "Don't-"

 

" ** _I'LL KILL THAT BASTARD FOR WHAT HE DID."_**

****

"He didn't do anything it was just an acci-" Ayato snapped his head towards Kaneki, who immediately recoiled in fear, with a feral look in his eyes.

 

" ** _Stay out of it."_**

****

Ayato roughly pushed Kaneki away from him, causing the white-haired man to trip and fall on his ass.

 

It was at that moment, that Hide, dressed in just his hoodie and boxers, decided to open the door to see what all the shouting was for. He took one look at Kaneki's position on the floor and at Ayato's snarling face before opening his mouth.

 

"What the fuck did you do to Kaneki."

 

" _NOTHING. THIS IS BETWEEN YOU AND ME, PERVERT."_ Ayato pointed his finger in Hide's face threateningly.

 

"Woah. Calm down, man." Hide peered past Ayato's shorter frame. "Hey Kaneki, are you OK?" Kaneki nodded slowly, wondering how Hide kept his cool when he was freaking out about it an hour ago.

 

" _OI! DON'T IGNORE ME."_ Ayato grabbed Hide roughly by the collar and shoved him back into the bedroom. " _I WARNED YOU NOT TO COME BACK HERE."_  He continued to push Hide inside, until Kaneki could no longer see them from his place in the hallway.

 

" _Hey man, seriously. What do you want from me?"_

_**"I WANT YOU TO SHOVE YOUR BALLS UP YOUR ASS"** _

__

  
_"Really?- look do you want me compliment you? Do you need an ego booster? Because ok, you dance-"_ Kaneki buried his head in his hands.

_**"DON'T FUCKING FINSH THAT SENTENCE."** _

__

_"-really well, better than me, even if you're naked and your penis-"_

Only when Kaneki heard a loud crash, did he bother to get up off his backside and run into his bedroom. 

 

"Oh my god." Kaneki's eyes widened. Ayato was now sitting on top of Hide on the floor, his hands wrapped around Hide's neck while squeezing hard.

 

" _Shut up shut up shut up."_ Ayato chanted while banging Hide's head against the floor, Kaneki gasped and ran up to pull Ayato off Hide.

 

"Ayato!" Kaneki screamed over the chanting. "You're going to far!" He put his arms around Ayato's waist and pulled with all his might, but Ayato just  wouldn't. Let. Go. Hide made strangled noises, as if he was trying to say something and Kaneki watched in horror as Hide, being the complete _idiot_ that he is, laughed in Ayato's face.

 

" _...what the fuck did you just-"_ Ayato said the rest of his sentence in incoherent growling and pressed his fingers so dangerously hard into Hide's throat, that Kaneki could see his knuckles growing white. 

 

"Ayato," Kaneki screamed, desperately trying to pull him away. "You'll kill him!" Hide started chocking and his face grew increasingly red, but Ayato didn't let up, and instead grinned maniacally.

 

**_"He deserves it for being a dirty pervert."_ **

****

When Kaneki realised that his attempts to free Hide were futile, he rushed outside to the living room to retrieve his phone. Picking it up from the coffee table in front of the TV, Kaneki speed dialled the only person he knew could help in this situation.

 

_"What?"_

"Touka-chan! He's gonna kill him!" He shrieked down the phone.

 

" _Who's going to kill who?"_ Her voice had a bored tone to it.

 

"Your _brother_! He's going to kill Hide." Kaneki heard Touka sigh on the other end.

 

_"...Alright."_

 

She hung up without another word and Kaneki shook his head at the he response. It was such a... Touka like response.

 

_He just hoped that she-_

 

A bang coming from his bed jolted him out of his thoughts. He heard Hide shout out something and Ayato yell something back before another crash.

 

_He just hoped that she will come soon enough._

•••

 

 

 

Turns out Touka arrived a lot quicker than expected, _and_ she brought her uncle, Yomo, with her.

 

It also turns out that Touka could separate Ayato and Hide far more easier than Kaneki could (One sharp glare sent in Ayato's direction was more than enough.)

 

But it also turns out that Kaneki's bedroom was completely trashed during the fight, after it had been broken up Kaneki almost cried at the state of his room; almost all books on his shelf scattered on the floor, a leg on his desk completely snapped off and everything atop it throw around the room.

 

  
_Just kill me now,_ Kaneki thought miserably.

 

They all were stationed in the living room; Touka sitting on the couch, legs up on the coffee table, Kaneki and Hide on the couch opposite her, Yomo trying to calm Ayato down on the other side of the room, half inside the kitchen. 

 

"I think we all learnt a lesson today." Touka raised her voice so everyone could hear it. " _Don't be an idiot_." Everyone rolled their eyes at the pointless teaching.

 

 "Nice one, Dumbass Touka." Ayato shouted, rubbing at the bruise on his jaw in irritation. His lips still curled in disdain when he noticed Hide's presence in the room.

 

"Shut up, shitty brother, you're an idiot because you don't know how to lock doors." She and Hide both sniggered.

 

"That's what I said." Hide's voice cracked halfway through, it had become scratchy and deeper after being throttled by Ayato, making Kaneki wince and continue to wrap the first aid bandages around Hide's neck carefully.

 

"Don't get cocky." Touka chortled, crossing her arms over her chest. "You're an idiot too for not learning when to _shut up_ and just _apologise_." Hide spluttered in disbelief. "Serves you right that you lost your voice."

 

"Touka that's mean." Kaneki piped, after he finished dressing Hide's neck. He then moved on to wrap a bandage around Hide's head, gently lifting up the blond hair.

 

"Oi. I'm telling him what he needs to hear." Touka reached down to the table to pick up her mug of tea. "You're an idiot as well, you know." Kaneki faltered. "You should have called me before all of this escalated."

 

"H-How was I supposed to know-" Kaneki gave up when Touka noisily sipped her drink in his face. "Ok." 

 

"Even I'm an idiot." Everyone turned to Touka in surprise. "I should have foreseen this kind of thing happening." Ayato huffed and limped out of the room while muttering something to himself and Hide tutted.

 

"She right in a way," Yomo's gruff voice began, as he walked to stand behind Touka's couch. "You all need to learn from this and know how to deal with it if it happens again. There may be a time when no one is there to help you." Kaneki and Hide nodded with small " _Yes sir_ " 's while Touka smugly looked on.

 

"See. I'm always right." She boasted, Kaneki and Hide staring at her distastefully.

 

"Touka," Yomo shook his head and smiled. " _Let's head back now."_

 

 

 

 

•••

 

 

 

 

_"Hide, were you the person who changed my contact name?"_

_"..."_

_"Hide!"_

_"What~ It was funny and we matched."_

_"Well I changed yours."_

_"What. How did-!?"_

  
_"Your now "_ **Idiot1** "."


End file.
